“You make artworks from things you find, don’t you?” he asked as they were having their usual gasbag on the street.

“Because I could save you these port corks and then you can make something, like those bags of yours made out the champagne thingies. I could collect 2 a day because I only drink the good stuff.

My old uncle told me you have to drink the bottles where the cork goes ‘plonk’ when you open it. He said don’t drink that cheap stuff with the screw cap it’ll make you crook.

When you have your exhibition you can say it was my idea and you made it, but I wouldn’t accept any money though”.